If I had Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder…

If I had Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD) I would hope that people would know that I would not be FASD but a person who happens to have this disability.  That, just as with anyone who has any sort of condition or disability, I am unique and until you know me you don’t KNOW me!  That I may behave certain ways due to my brain injury but I am not purposefully acting out.  I am experiencing situations where I may not be able to do things you want me to but it is not because I am refusing to do them.

If I had FASD I would hope that everyone would understand that this is a permanent disability and I cannot outgrow it.  You cannot parent it out of me or make me learn to not have this condition.  I would always need to have people help me with certain things and I may at times resent this but that does not mean you should stop trying.  Please remember that I want to please you…I want to fit in.

If I had FASD I hope that there is a future for me.  A place that is safe for me and people who understand.  Who take the time to get to know me and to get to understand this condition that I have.

I am blessed I was NOT prenatally exposed to alcohol.  But honestly I could have been.  There have been so many mixed up messages to women of child bearing age.  We have not touched on how to truly support women who are dealing with alcoholism.  Somehow we have to get out the right messages.  We have to work toward a realistic approach to prevention…realizing that some of the women are women who happen to be dealing with having the disability of FASD themselves.  Until we deal with this we will never prevent FASD or help anyone who is dealing with it.

If I had FASD I would be so happy that you bothered to read this and that you passed it on.  Spread the word.  FASD is preventable…let’s work on it.


About fasmom

The adoptive mom to 12 wonderful children who are affected by Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and other issues including Reactive Attachment Disorder, bipolar, schizophrenia, CP, epilepsy and oh the list goes on...The thing is these children have taught me things about myself I never knew and would not have missed out on learning. Married to an amazing man and enjoying life on a sheep ranch.
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3 Responses to If I had Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder…

  1. I was just thinking about this yesterday. The fact is that they are not FAS…they have FAS and I’m so glad that you addressed this. And the fact is that any one of us could have this. I actually asked my Mom if she drank when she was pregnant with me because there are times when it feels like it. She didn’t.
    Beautiful words!

  2. Thank you for writing this. You have great insight on a very difficult to deal with syndrome. May I copy this and share? Luvyums@ juno.com

  3. abcdisorders says:

    So true! The one thing that creates the difference in my little one’s behavior at school and her behavior at home is wanting to fit in. The one thing I wish family members and friends would do is quit trying to “heal” her (or criticize me for failing to do so). Sometimes it feels like I am the only one who really and truly “gets” her. Thanks for this writing. Sheila

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