You don’t need the doctor… they are just boobs!

Okay so I am touching a very touchy subject and it is PUBERTY!  and not just puberty but pernicious puberty (or puberty occurring very early).  So how do you deal with a child who is 48 pounds and the size of a 5 year old who is also very mentally young due to her Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) and who is now going through puberty?  I will back up a little and tell you the whole story.

R is now 10.  Really for most people to believe that she is not 5 we need to bring her birth certificate.  Earlier this summer she had a lump in her right breast.  I knew immediately we were in trouble.  It was a breast bud and sure enough in the next few days the other breast was also starting.  R has been most angry at me that I will not take her in to get her pediatrician to “fix” this.  We spoke to his nurse who gave great ideas for the pain like warm wash clothes on them to help with the soreness etc.  R is not okay with this she wants the lumps out.  PERIOD.  Speaking of…well now we have to worry about that starting.  I am not sure that they even make pads small enough for a size 4 bottom.  I know that the emotional roller coaster is definitely here already.  We already have issues with the whole bi-polar thing and now add in the monthly emotional train wreck.

LOTS of tears last night.  Not mine (I did that later), but hers.  She wanted to know why in the world she would need boobs.  She is too young to have babies and now that bottles have been invented why in the world would girls need them at all?  Well good point but when boobs were originally invented there were no great bottles like Dr. Browns, etc.  I don’t want to get into too much information with her about how breast feeding is the best after all she is right and is WAY too young to be a mom or really for the birds and bees talk.  My children are a bit more advanced on that front as we live on a farm and so they do know about breeding but we don’t exactly talk about it all and I am not ready to go there yet.

I realize this is just one more aspect of prenatal alcohol exposure that robs this little girl of her childhood.  She is dealing with stuff that she should not have to deal with and really I had counted on several more years before my girls were dealing with this (and before I had to deal with it!)  So anyone who has great advice on puberty feel free to give it.  R has said she is so afraid now she has to grow up and cannot be my little girl.  I have reassured her that at almost 40 I am still my mom’s little girl and always will be.  She looked at me and laughed as apparently she cannot imagine me as a little girl at all.


About fasmom

The adoptive mom to 12 wonderful children who are affected by Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and other issues including Reactive Attachment Disorder, bipolar, schizophrenia, CP, epilepsy and oh the list goes on...The thing is these children have taught me things about myself I never knew and would not have missed out on learning. Married to an amazing man and enjoying life on a sheep ranch.
This entry was posted in Adoption, Childhood Mental Health Issues, Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, Foster Care, legal system, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to You don’t need the doctor… they are just boobs!

  1. Connie Kapfenstein says:

    Gosh having adopeted a boy I didn’t even think of that issue..I am so glad she has you!! Good job Nora.

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